Own It! Why Your Goals Don't Have To Make Sense To Others
Have you ever been in a situation where people question one of your decisions? Or in a spot where you feel like people just don't get where you're coming from? I'll be the first to admit it happens all the time in my own life, but I see it happen for many people in fitness.
When we train, we often pick it up based on some desire to achieve a goal. We're moving toward an end outcome. But something I see people fall to in their training is changing their goals off of public opinion or perception. The person who wants to run a 5K comes under fire from the person who thinks CrossFit has better health objectives, and the weightlifter comes under fire from the people who still think lifting weights is dangerous. It even happens in our personal lives. We have a goal of owning our own business, or embarking on a venture that others don't see for us but we see for ourselves.
The problem people run into when it comes to goals is not owning them. They state them, but they don't truly own them. They let others sway and reshape their goals to what they think, and not what you think. But there's a problem with this: they're not you! They aren't the one trying to attain the goal, they're just projecting it onto you!
I'll give you a personal example:
I've been pursuing a Master's of Arts in Teaching (MAT) for three years now. When I started, it was because I wanted to be a high school strength coach and the best way to do that was to get a Physical Education degree and get hired on as the PE teacher who teaches the weight training classes. But I lost the fire and passion for that years ago. In fact, I don't really remember a time that I was stoked about signing up for classes or even going to do rotations in a school. But everyone around me was excited, and they've thrown high school teaching job applications in my direction frequently (at least, for one school), and so even when the fire died I've kept pursuing the degree. I'll be thankful when it's completed this fall.
Finally, a few weeks ago after more job opportunities fell through, and even withdrawing my candidacy from one, I finally had to start having the hard conversation with friends and family: the goal they had for me is not the one I had for myself. And chasing their goal was draining me. I had to start chasing my own goals again.
And that's where you have to go to! Who cares if you want to run a 5K or squat triple bodyweight (an impressive feat)?! The people who see something different don't have to look you in the eye in the mirror every morning. They don't have to get up to the alarm you set, or go through the process. You have to own your own goals. You have to pursue what you want to pursue. Ultimately, people will have opinions, but you have to realize that they are just opinions and not the final say. You have the final say, and that's all that matters!
Once you own your goals, you start to own your life. So own it, and don't let others say otherwise!